by Jessie Brewin These stupid mistakes can ruin the first date. Read till the end before you go out.
Men sometimes do their best but, from a woman’s perspective, behave like idiots on dates. They take a shower, clean their shoes, pay attention to their hair-do, but forget something more substantial—the psychology of relationships. Unfortunately, there are mistakes that girls never forgive.
1. Being too suggestive
You see her. You like her. You immediately invite her to go to your place, don’t you? Obviously, banal communication with a girl and her inner world may be not that interesting for you. Of course, if a girl also wants to move forward, everything is fine. Yet, a stubborn macho is unlikely to appeal to a woman who is looking for a serious relationship. An immediate proposal to start a relationship is a 100% failure guarantee as well. This is very repulsive.
2. Showing no sexual initiative at all
This situation is the opposite of #1. Oh, girls and their hang-ups. They do not know what they want. Let me show what I mean with my friend’s example. He invited a woman, a lover of nature, for a walk in the forest. They wandered all day long, talked a lot, picked up two buckets of mushrooms. As a result, the timid lover asked permission to kiss the girl. “Finally!” she said with a sigh. “I thought that I killed all day on mushrooms in vain.” Got it?
3. Being late for the date
If anyone can afford to linger (and no, this is not being late), these are only women. And their reasons are compelling: to do perfect makeup, curl her hair, change her mind and straighten hair, try on three dresses, burst into tears and redo the makeup completely—all this can take more time than she allocated. Yet, when men come later, it’s unforgivable: if you allow yourself to come even some 20 minutes after the due time, you run the risk of impressing the girl as an unreliable and simply ill-mannered person! Gosh, how dare you?
4. Having no plan
Before the date starts, you should already have a clear plan built up. Where will you take the girl? What places are best for a walk? Where will you dine? Even if the scenario is completely replayed in the end, it doesn’t matter. The main thing is that this very scenario exists. Believe me, not a single girl wants to hear the passive, “Did you think where to go today?” Any girl expects initiative from a man. Just face it and think over a plan for at least the first few meetings.
5. Excessive bragging
The desire to show off your achievements and skills is normal. However, sometimes men are so keen on telling entrancing stories about their lives that a date can turn into a praising monologue. At first, it becomes annoying. Later the girl may even doubt that you are telling the truth.
6. Not taking care of her
Take a look at your girl. If she came on a date on high heels, most likely, your idea to go through all the best parks in the city would fail.
Sure, walking in the fresh air is wonderful. But girls are extremely delicate creatures, and therefore comfort means a lot for the vast majority of them. If you do not want to see tears on her face instead of joyful emotions, it is better to opt for the option “to have a good time in a restaurant or to watch a movie.” Save the active scenario for future dates.
7. Ordering dishes that are inconvenient to eat
Wings, ribs, and other food that you cannot eat without getting your hands dirty are absolute taboos for a first date. The sauce, striving to “settle down” on your chin, while you are focused on a piece of juicy meat, obviously will add no points to your charm. Impressionable young ladies will run away from you, as soon as they get such an opportunity. In this case, you can’t even dream about the first kiss.
By the way, try to clarify whether your girl is a vegetarian before the first date. After all, if the answer is yes, you should find a good restaurant with a delicious vegetarian menu.
8. Paying attention to other girls
Since you invited this particular girl on a date, do a favor—do not show a token of appreciation to other ladies. Even if you are such a loving creature, try to man up and focus on the girl who came to meet you. Otherwise, it may be your last date. Girls have unique peripheral vision, and even if it seems to you that all your gazes in the direction of other women will go unnoticed, you are deeply mistaken.
9. Whining too much
Trying to cause her sympathy is not the best way to win her heart. Of course, she will listen to all your heartbreaking stories about how at the age of six your beloved dog was hit by a car and how the leader of a local gang periodically mocked at you at school, and how you are undervalued at work. She will listen, feel sorrow for you—and then disappear forever. Women do not need losers and whiners. It is not sexy and completely not reliable. Work on yourself, be a man, strong and capable of removing any mountains or at least striving for it.
10. Paying more attention to a smartphone than to a girl
Just turn off your phone. Your girl will appreciate it with much greater enthusiasm than if you bring her a bouquet of the most beautiful roses. Your readiness to entirely devote your evening only to her, not distracted by messages on Facebook and updating the feed on Instagram, speaks volumes.
11. Leaving without a beautiful date ending
Everyone, even the most confident girl, having said goodbye to a man after the first date, gets the jitters. “What if he didn’t like me? What if I’m too fat? Damn, I shouldn’t wear light trousers, they make me fat.” Such thoughts often appear in girls’ heads. If you really liked her and would like to continue the relationship, end the first date right. In other words, be sure to let the girl know that she intrigued you very much. Any ideas are good: beautiful words, romantic kisses, and, of course, a special SMS, which you should send when she comes home.
Now you have it! Today’s world doesn’t oblige a man to wear his best suit and demonstrate exquisite manners on the first date. Yet, the elementary rules of the first date are still in force. This is an eternal classic. Men, do not make the above mistakes on your first date if you are planning to have the second one.
