Tune2Love Blog

Online Dating and Relationship Advices

“After how many dates is it a relationship?” is a rather tricky question… and a popular one. In this article, we’ll try to figure it out.

Girls and boys have their own relationship laws and rules. Some of them work, others don’t. Discover the main rules of relationships and … do it your own way.

What is the 3 date rule?

This rule says you shouldn’t have sex or kiss before your 3rd date. Ridiculous? Sometimes.

If you are not ready to move to this level of relationship, tell the person about it directly. If after your refusal they stop calling, well, it means that the person had no desire to chase you and get to know you better.

Follow when you are interested in a long-term relationship and even marriage. In the “Goals” column of your diary, it says “Get married this year !!!”, so you go on dates almost more often than to work. In this case, strictly adhere to the third date rule so as not to waste time on casual relationships.

Don’t follow if you are not particularly looking for anyone – you are doing your favorite job, making far-reaching plans, or just recovering after a recent breakup, then you are the very person who can afford not to care about any rules and just follow own feelings.

How many dates should you go on before you make a decision?

If you are to decide whether you want to build a serious relationship with a person and want to know how many dates before it’s a relationship, you need to ask yourself a couple of questions. Then, the answer will become clear.

  • Do you want to consider “other options”?

If you do, you are still in doubt. And that’s the sign not to force yourself to make any decisions about your relationship’s status.

  • Can you plan your future together?

If yes, it means you subconsciously consider this person a good match.

  • Do you trust each other? 

That’s vital. If you believe a person, you can rely on them completely.

A couple riding a bike
Photo by Karen Warfel from Pixabay

But if you still want to get a certain number of dates before relationship, 10 dates is optimal, according to psychologists.

What date should you kiss?

You can follow the 3 date rule if you long for a serious relationship and don’t want to seem easy to get, which is, by the way, a great strategy of earning men’s hearts.

If you want just to have fun and feel desired right here and right now, why not kiss on the first date? It’s only your choice!

But don’t wait for too long as your potential partner may lose interest.

How many dates before you sleep together?

Do it regardless of the number of your dates, it all depends on the desire and connection between partners.

But sexologists recommend avoiding intimate relationships on the first date.

It is believed that for men and women, a certain game consisting of three stages is important.

The first is romance: conversations, smiles, walks. At this point, important hormones are released to help start a relationship. In the second stage is of body contact – you can allow yourself contact with your hands and kissing. And only at the third stage can you move on to intimacy.

In addition, sex on a first date can not only negatively affect future relationships but also cause psychological trauma. But for most people, three to five dates will be enough.

Top things not to think about on a date: What is the dating rule?

It is common to be nervous when we meet new people and try to get to know them better. Our mind becomes full of a lot of questions and we forget about the most important thing: all we should think about is how we feel with this person. So, out of your head these thoughts:

  • Is your partner interested in you?
  • Does he or she think that you are an attractive person?
  • What does their body language mean?

Instead of these questions, focus on how you feel on the date and what your intuition says to you.

A couple kissing in a field
Photo by aliceabc0 from Pixabay

Why you don’t feel comfortable on the date

There can be a lot of reasons why you don’t feel comfortable on the date:

  • you have a different sense of humor
  • your partner can be cautious or distrustful by nature
  • he or she can be a person with problems in communication.

It is normal if you are shy on your first date, but if you don’t know what to say on your third date and feel out of sorts, it’s a sign.

Not all relationships are successful, and you shouldn’t try too much to build a relationship with a person who doesn’t fit you.

“How many dates until you are in a relationship?” is a wrong question, don’t dwell on numbers, just feelings.

What most long-term couples say about their first date

Almost all couples who are together for more than ten years will tell you that they feel comfortable from the beginning of communication. But all rules have exceptions, and you can hear stories when one partner didn’t like or notice another when they met, but over time everything changed. But, don’t think that is your case, too: you shouldn’t wait for a miracle that your partner becomes someone else one day. Bollow your principles and don’t expect from people something they can’t give you. 

Several people say that they hate dating. It is a result of unsuccessful dates with not compatible partners. When you are not sure, you start to ask friends, expert opinions, or Google: how many dates before a kiss, how to understand that they are the one, etc. You can prepare for the date, but you couldn’t force yourself to feel relaxed when it is not true.

Why we keep going on dates with people who don’t suit us

Sometimes we try to build a relationship with “not our” people. It happens for several reasons:

  • we are tired to be alone
  • he or she has several attractive features
  • we like their way of life, career and want to be a part of this.

There is one tip of how you can check whether you two are compatible: ask yourself if you are happy with this person if you can be yourself when you are with them? If your answer is no, you know what to do.

Don’t blame yourself if you are a wrong match. It isn’t a competition, you should be natural and honest with yourself and the person in front of you. If you see the tendency that all your dates are not successful, maybe you make wrong decisions and should change something. By doing so, you can build a real and harmonious relationship.

We hope this article helped you to figure out how many dates before relationship.

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